Hoodwinked
by Kody Wright
Summary: A woman doctor is hoodwinked into enlisting in the Army as a nurse. To conceal the act she is sent to the 4077th. Where food poisening puts everyone in danger.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

She found her job most difficult. It was physically demanding, emotionally exhausting and mentally debasing. This new job wasn't what she had agreed to perform and the new assignment in Korea gave the feeling of punishment for the young doctor rather than fulfilling a need. She was now in the Army Nurse Corps. Something she didn't sign up for. The Army Medical Corps actively recruited her. Enticing her with a commissioned rank and a long career in the Army. The offer seemed too good to be true. For the only place she could find a job as a surgeon was at a charity hospital.

She took up the offer, reporting to the nearest office where she was suddenly hoodwinked into joining the Army Nursing Corps. Assured that woman doctors where placed in the Nursing Corps due to separation of gender but she would still be a much needed surgeon and doctor working in the Army hospitals far from harms way. She soon found herself in Tokyo working as a nurse. She did complain and even gave allegations of deception only to be sent even closer to the front; far away from civilization and any real hope of having her placement correctly moved to the Army Medical Corps.

Shipped off to become a nurse at the MASH 4077th in Korea during the height of the campaign. The deception weighed heavily on her and slowly ate away at her soul. The young, enthusiastic surgeon who once thrived on charity work soon became bitter, harsh and made few friends.

Perhaps it was her name that got her into the mess? After all not many women are name "Frankie." Not Francine but Frankie. Dr. Frankie Peterman. She was very proud of the title and of the accomplishment. A woman doctor was rare, a woman surgeon even more so. Working and going to a women's college for medicine. For the more popular male dominated colleges refused to admit her despite her above average acceptance exams.

It was the charity hospital that helped her with her tuition and cost of living. Upon graduation she planed on getting a high paying job in a major hospital and rightfully pay the charity back. But with lack of employment her repayment was done in work for the charity's hospital.

And right now she had wished she had stayed at that small little hospital in the middle of nowhere. For there she was at lest called, "Doctor." Now her new titles were "Lieutenant" or "Nurse." Neither of which she much enjoyed under the deception that placed her in the situation.

Right now she was a nurse in a MASH or Mobile Army Surgical Hospital and a lousy nurse at that. She actually couldn't do the job very well. Making beds was much more difficult than she ever imagined it could be. The bottom sheet had to be so tight a coin could bounce on it and her sheets could never be as tight as army regulations. Not even on her own cot.

The next task she found most unpleasant was her duty as "Bedpan Commando." Sure, she could cut open a human body and fix whatever was wrong with absolutely no issues. However, the mere smell of human fecal matter made her nearly vomit every time.

She did excel at bandage dressing changing due to her surgical background and her job as a surgical nurse was superb to a point where is worked against her. She knew the surgery department inside and out and could have operated with her eyes closed. She knew which instruments the operating doctor would call for and which type of suture he would close with. She was nearly a mind reader for the operating staff. And that ability made her a target for some very jealous nurses who couldn't comprehend how she could be so bad at nursing but so good at assisting surgery. And right now that jealously was making her uneasy transition to the MASH unit even worse.

She stood with the other lot of women. She was short even for a nurse. No more than five foot and two inches tall. Her hair was auburn red and her face oval with fine features.

Corporal Klinger stood before them with his usually bag of mail. He smiled brightly upon the nurses and was generally in good spirits. Something that was as of lately was the direct opposite of Frankie. Not expecting any mail she stood with the group and watched as Klinger handed out envelopes and boxes.

"Nurse Kellye," He stated while holding up a brown package.

The nurse was a bit more plump than most. Her features reflected her ethnic background of half Chinese and half Hawaiian. "Here," she said as she politely took the package from the large hairy hand of the corporal.

"Goodies from home?" Klinger grinned as his mind pictures home made treats.

"Hope so," she agreed. "It's from my mother."

"Ah, nothing like mom's cooking." He remarked as his hand scooped out a bunch of letters. He read the name. "Nurse Hicks."

"Here," another voice called out.

Frankie found mail call to be a grueling operation. She never received any mail. Not even from the hospital that once employed her. She wasn't even sure if the other nurses even knew she was a doctor. But the command surly would have known. It would be in her file. She secretly prayed for some vindication. A letter addressed to her as "Dr. Peterman" or better yet a letter informing her the Army was wrong and she was immediately going to be placed in the position of surgeon. However, deep down inside she knew no such event would occur for the army would rather hide such a mistake than own up to it, especially in regards to women.

Klinger looked at the cover of a magazine. It read _American Medical Association. _He had seen the magazine come for Dr. Pierce and assumed it was his. Upon double-checking the label he surprised himself, "Dr. Peterman."

Her eyes grew wide. She never imagined her subscription would follow her to the ends of the earth. "Here," she took the magazine.

A low snicker filled the air from the surrounding nurses.

Klinger assumed, "Must be a typo."

Not wishing to get into details about her personal dilemma she simply nodded.

Klinger suggested, "I know Captain Pierce has been waiting for his magazine. Maybe he could read yours after you're done?"

Captain "Hawkeye" Pierce was far from Frankie's favorite surgeon. She actually found him rather annoying, humorless and irritating. As a doctor she couldn't fault him but as a doctor who flirted too much with the nurses she became less than objective. Everything she had fought so hard against: the womanizing, the male doctors flirting with nurses, the demeaning jokes…Se found were wrapped up into one man.

She wanted to slap him whenever he suggested one of the nurses join him for "cocktails" in some out of the way area. Luckily the nurses were onto Hawkeye's flirtation and merely played a game with him. One of shooting him down every chance they got.

A depression had taken hold of her. She suddenly didn't feel like even reading the magazine anymore. She handed the magazine back to Klinger.

"Why don't you just give it to him. He could use it more than me anyhow." The attitude reflected her anger. Deep inside she would have shared with the other staff her last sip of water in a dire situation but this case made her feel like even less of a doctor and thus she couldn't be bothered with it.

"Um, okay." Klinger placed the magazine under his arm. "I'll let him know you gave it to him."

"Anything else for me?"

"Nope," Klinger stated while double-checking the contents of his bag.

"Okay," she walked off.

The corporal stood rather puzzled. Looking upon her as she walked towards the mess hall. He muttered more to himself than to the crowd.

"Strange."

"You're telling me," Nurse Kellye agreed.

He looked at the nurse for more detail.

Kellye continued, "She's never very friendly. I've seen orderlies be better nurses. She has this bizarre ability to read the doctor's minds in the OR. And now she has magazines addressed to her as 'doctor.' Weird! It's like she's some wanna be doctor or something."

"More like self-taught doctor," Nurse Baker chimed. Snickers erupted about the area.

"Seriously, why didn't she just go to medical school if she wanted to be a doctor?" Nurse Able asked.

Klinger didn't enjoy being part of a conspiracy when it came to other members of the MASH unit. He decided to get back to his current duty.

"Um, next package is for Williams."

**Colonel Potter's Office**

The staff meeting was to address new surgical means but soon it became a means of airing complaints against a certain not-so-friendly nurse. Major Houlihan sat on the edge of her chair. Her blonde locks neatly brushed back from her face. Bright blue eyes pleaded with her colonel.

"Sir, I don't know what else to do with her."

The crusty old colonel leaned forward in the creaky wooden chair. He was already tempted to open up a bottle of scotch and begin an early afternoon drunken stupor.

Instead he replied, "She's a good surgical nurse."

Margaret "Hotlips" Houlihan waved her arms around, "She's a wonderful surgical nurse. Heck, I wish I had ten more like her but as a soldier and over all nurse…She awful. She's not very friendly towards other staff; she's okay with the patients but tends to ask more diagnostic related questions which eats up time. Where did she receive her training from, Sir?"

Charles Winchester snickered, "Nursing Finishing School?"

In his best Groucho Marx impression Hawkeye Pierce added, "Where Nurses are finished."

Not amused Capt. BJ Hunnicutt defended, "Okay…She's not the best nurse when it comes to bedside manner. However, she's one hell of a surgical nurse. And we need surgical nurses of her caliber more than we need 'Betty Davis' type nurses."

"It would be better if we could have 'Betty Davis,'" Hawkeye chirped. "At least we could have someone pretending to be a nurse. Which is more than I can say for Nurse Peterman."

Sherman Potter cleared his throat, "Actually boys and girls…I don't know where she got her schooling from. Her records are nearly blank."

"How can her records be blank?" Major Houlihan asked.

"I only got her most recent assignment in them. No schooling or previous history. I can pull some strings at ICOR and see what comes up. So far, all I know is she had some sort of a run in with brass in Tokyo and was then sent here."

"What type of 'run in?'" Hawkeye wondered.

Potter shook his head, "Don't know. The records that I got don't go into detail. All I got is her basic ID and a notification of insubordination."

"No idea what for?" Houlihan asked. "I would need to know if she has some sort of history. Did she endanger a patient? What did she do?"

"Don't know," Potter repeated. "Her records are pretty bare. I can't see any reason to ship her out either. She hasn't placed any patients at risk. Just stepped on a few toes. Unless she does something to harm a patient there is nothing I can really do."

"But she is making the other nurses job's more difficult."

The colonel didn't buy the excuse, he asked, "How so?"

"By alienating them. She's a regular know it all in the O.R. Just cold to the other nurses and to the doctors."

Hawkeye perked up, "I can attest to her being cold." He then mocked in his impression, "Matter of fact, I've seen freezers that are warmer."

Annoyed by the interruption the major shot him a look, she then continued, "She's making it difficult to communicate. So far she has done okay but what if she fails to pass on vital information to one of the doctors and a patient ends up dying?"

"If she were to fail to pass vital information on purpose she would face a court martial. If it was an accident she would be discharged for incompetence."

Upset the major retorted, "So we would have to wait for someone to die before anything can be done about her?"

Colonel Potter snorted, "Hopefully no one will die. And I also can't see sending needed help away simply because she isn't very popular. Especially when we need all the help we can get in this war."

Hawkeye casually waved, "We'll just wait for her to snap like Frank did? Then we can send her away."

BJ countered, "But Frank really was a lousy surgeon. I think Peterman would be able to do his job with her eyes closed. Peterman isn't like Frank Burns. She is good at what she does and so far, I haven't seen any issues when it comes to communications. She puts the patients first. Not herself."

"Why are you defending her Beege?

Hunnicutt replied, "I just don't think it's fair to have everyone gang up against her. Especially when she didn't do anything to deserve it. Yes, she's not very friendly and yes, she can be cold to the staff and yes, she could be a bit more on the ball with the bed pans. But when comes to life saving techniques she knows what she is doing."

Defeated Hawkeye and Major Houlihan looked at one another. The doctor gave a bit of a shrug and conceded.

Hawkeye added, "Yeah, she's a good surgical nurse and we do need that. I just hate to see something happen to a patient or the nurses uncomfortable around her. Maybe someone should talk to her?"

Margaret Houlihan retorted, "I have been talking to her. It hasn't done any good."

BJ corrected, "Have you been 'talking' to her or 'lecturing' her? Let's face it Margaret, you do tend to give orders rather than 'talk' to the nurses."

"I'm her commanding officer," The Major defended.

Colonel Potter interrupted, "Now settle down folks. I have already placed a call to Sidney Freedman about her. I'm gonna have him 'talk' to her. This is obviously out of our realm of medicine. Whatever happened in Tokyo hopefully he can get to the bottom of it."

"Sounds like a plan," Hawkeye agreed.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

War was never silent, still or glorious. It was never romantic or exciting. War in itself was just plain barbaric. And no place was that more apparent than in an operating room filled with wounded soldiers.

Soldiers who were barely men, many as young as eight-teen years old and few were older then twenty-one. All were labeled "enlisted" which in Frankie Peterman found closer to the definition of "expendable." She was told that a soldier's job was to stay alive and fight. But the reality seemed to be just the opposite. Young boys shot down in the prime of their youth. If they were lucky they survived the most severe wounds and were sent back home. Only to have another young boy sent to take the other's place.

It seemed like such a waste to Frankie. The whole situation was a waste. There she stood in an operating theater assisting doctors by handing them instruments and stabilizing wounds. Even with a full staff the MASH unit needed more surgeons. She was one as well but not allowed to operate; to help relive the congestion of patients and make the mere assembly line of wounded go faster. It was such a waste of another doctor.

Assisting Charles Winchester for her was better than assisting Hawkeye Pierce. For Charles seemed to appreciate her uncanny ability to read his mind and always have the right tool for the job ready. Of course their crossing fields in the chest cavity of the body helped. Thoracic surgery and cardiac surgery had similar techniques and procedures. While Hawkeye Pierce was a wonderful meatball surgeon, she never knew exactly how he would approach certain procedures. But with Charles…It was a piece of cake.

As Charles chummily spoke to his assistant he tried to lighten the mood. Ever so pleased with a nurse that knew exactly how he would work he smiled from behind his mask. In some vein effort he tried to make the new nurse feel welcome.

"I must say Nurse Peterman, your ability to read my mind is uncanny." His hand grasped the instrument she held out for him. "Perhaps, when this war is over, you might be interested in a position working under me at Boston."

She let out a sigh, "Probably be the only job I could get."

He wasn't sure if she was joking or serious. Trying not to sound offended Charles added, "Your skills as a surgical nurse are superb. It's nice to have a nurse who knows exactly what I will do and what I will do it with."

Frankie rebutted, "Trust me. It's not that hard." She held out the next instrument he would need.

Hawkeye squawked from across the room, "Reading Charles's mind was never that hard. It's remarkably simple for such a well rounded individual."

"Ha-ha-ha, Pierce!" Charles then looked at Frankie. "Seriously, Nurse Peterman. I wouldn't mind working with you in a civilian hospital. Which would also be far more civilized than here."

"Would you pay me the same salary as you?"

He coughed in surprise, "Same salary as me?" Chuckling, "Though nurses are a needed part of medicine they certainly don't render the same services and salary as a man."

"Man or doctor?" Frankie asked. She turned her attention towards stabilizing the wound with retractors.

"Not that's much of a difference," Charles remarked. "Nurses are always the feminine variety."

She wanted to smack him but instead replied, "Of course doctor." She rolled her eyes.

Hawkeye spoke up from examining his patient. "This poor kid has a piece of shrapnel stuck in the side of the aorta."

The Colonel asked, "You want Winchester to take him?"

"I think I got it," he stated in thought.

BJ Hunnicutt volunteered, "I'll help. My guy is finished."

Frankie tried to sneak a peak at the inside of the dying man to see the damage. Her mind conjured the patch needed for a successful operation. It would be a delicate surgery using an artery from a cadaver. A surgery that would require the heart to be stopped and the patient placed on a bypass machine.

Assessing the wound and the limited supplies BJ suggested, "Think we can get sutures in before he bleeds to death?"

"Don't have time to hook him up," Pierce replied. He spoke to Major Houlihan. "Margaret, we're gonna need lots of blood."

She stated, "I'm on it." Heading towards the door she paused as Peterman spoke up.

Frankie stated, "Cool him down and then put him on bypass. Do a full patch."

"Cooling him down is an idea," Hawkeye agreed. "Don't need a full dissection."

"Sutures won't hold," Frankie warned. "The artery is too far damaged."

"Thank you for that insight!" Hawkeye was getting irritated. Who was she? Some nurse telling him how to operate. "I think we got it, Nurse."

"It won't hold," Frankie warned.

"Why don't you let the doctors decided that?" Hawkeye didn't actually ask or suggest but rather demanded.

"I'm sure Pierce and Hunnicutt can handle it," Charles added. He spoke smoothly, "We have our own patient to tend too."

Feeling not only useless but also degraded, Frankie tried to put the needed procedure out of her mind. She handed the next tool to Charles. Still glancing over her shoulder to spy on the procedure.

Charles corrected, "Other clamp. I need the other clamp."

"Sorry." She handed him a different tool. Still distracted by the other work.

Charles looked at her and glanced at the patient Hawkeye and BJ were working on. He noticed her anxiousness. It worried him, for now he feared she was an "arm chair surgeon." Someone with no real training who considered himself or herself a doctor, a condition that could be detrimental to the unit as a whole.

**Later**

After hours of marathon surgery the company doctors found themselves sitting in the scrub room. Seated on the bench an exhausted Hawkeye Pierce threw his surgical gown in the hamper.

He let out a frustrated grunt, "Can you believe that nurse?"

BJ Hunnicutt sat next to his friend. With an equally exhausted move he asked, "You mean Peterman?"

"Yeah," The captain nodded. He threw up his arms. "She tried to tell me how to operate. I'm the chief surgeon and she is a nurse…And there she is trying to tell me how to operate."

"To be honest," BJ defended. "I'm not really sure if that suture will hold."

"Common Beege!" Hawkeye leaned forward. He couldn't believe his friend was actually defending her. "This nurse is literally trying to act like a doctor." Waving his finger about, "I bet you that's reason she was disciplined. Going above her level of training."

"Could be," BJ granted. "But we don't know that either. Matter of fact we don't know much about her."

Colonel Potter added to the conversation, "Now before you get your feathers in a dander, Pierce. Let me get her records from ICOR."

"She was telling me how to operate!" To Hawkeye there was no insult that could be worse than a subordinate instructing him.

As Major Winchester buttoned his shirt he voiced his own concern, "I must say that I am worried about the situation with Nurse Peterman. Though she is very knowledgeable and seems to have an uncanny grasp of thoracic procedures, I do fear that her desire to be more than a nurse could hamper her duties. She already has a tendency to diagnose patients during recovery. What if she were to take that a step further and try to treat patients as a doctor? That could be perilous for the patient as well as the unit."

Margaret Houlihan stormed into the area. She looked directly at Colonel Potter. "Sir, I would first like to apologize for Lieutenant Peterman's behavior in the OR today. And I request she is removed from active duty before she kills someone."

The colonel was actually rather fond of the young nurse. Her ability in the OR dazzled him as well. To the colonel it was obvious she had more than just nursing. He wasn't sure just what her education level was but doubted she was just a nurse.

He snapped at the team, "I'm still waiting for ICOR to send me her records. It's possible she might have some medical training. Now, I'm not saying she is a doctor or anything but it seems to me she does have more of a grasp on medical procedures than just a surgical nurse. And until I find out exactly what Peterman's education level is, I would appreciate it if you would not claim that she is gonna kill a patient. From what I've seen her ability in the OR rivals Pierce."

Hawkeye shook his head in disagreement, "Oh no! She is not a doctor. She is a surgical nurse pretending to be a doctor." He pointed his finger towards Charles. "Maybe she's good at keeping up with Charles, but I've seen her mess up giving me instruments."

"Usually she knows exactly what I will ask for," BJ chirped. "Of course, you can be more difficult."

"How am I difficult?"

BJ became rather meek. "Well, I noticed sometimes you would tell her to use a different instrument even though the one she handed you could have been used."

His mouth dropped. "Are you saying I am purposely making her change the instruments?"

"Are you?" BJ shrugged.

Major Houlihan waved her arms, "Peterman is a damn good surgical nurse. I'll give her that. But she tends to go way beyond just being a nurse. Pierce is right. She's trying to act like a doctor." She looked towards the Colonel. "Sir, I know you like her. She can be a little crusty but she means well. However, we cannot afford to have her diagnosing patients and acting like a surgeon. Even if she did go to a little bit of advanced school, she cannot pretend to be a doctor."

Potter let out a sigh, "I'm aware of that." He made a difficult decision. "Until I get her records and have Sidney talk to her, I will place her on suspension."

Margaret became grateful, "Thank you, Sir. I know how hard that is to do. Especially with someone as talented as Nurse Peterman."

"Yeah," The Colonel just nodded. As colonel his duties went far beyond the average doctor. He also had to be a commanding officer and administrator. Sometimes he wished those jobs belonged to someone else as well as the war itself. "I'll notify her myself, Margaret. It might be easier coming from me. Damn, I hate to sideline good people."

"It's for the best, Sir."

"Sadly," Winchester leaned against the wall. "I agree. We can't allow her to play doctor. She could kill someone."

Defeated BJ had to concur. "Sad but true. When does Sidney get here?"

"Tomorrow," Colonel Potter stated. "Hopefully, he can get down to the bottom of this."

**Morning**

Doctor Peterman didn't feel much like getting out of bed. Matter of fact she didn't feel like much of anything. She was placed on suspension for going beyond her duties, though she failed to see where she went she beyond her duties. She hadn't actually diagnosed anyone, nor did she administer treatment beyond what the doctors had ordered. Yet, she was being punished for, as far she could tell, being a good surgical nurse. It was new low for her after recent mistake of enlisting. She honestly didn't think she go much lower than being sent to a MASH unit as a nurse. But she did go lower, to the point were now she was depressed.

Potter had never asked if she attended medical school. She assumed he knew her history as a doctor and by suspending her was confirming she was not welcomed as a doctor. As far as Frankie knew…Everyone knew her past as a surgeon in a charity hospital.

So, in defeat of the army she surrendered to the comfort of the cot. Pulling the blanket up over her head and refusing to get up. It was at least an empowering decision. She now had the control as to whether or not she would move for that day. She found the irony humorous. Empowerment by suspension, for once they couldn't tell her what to do and she chose her own fate…One of utter laziness.

The door of the tent opened. A pair of heavy footsteps walked across the dirt floor to her cot. The footsteps were not of another nurse. She knew the figure looming over her was a man. Two men to be exact. She peaked out from under her covers and spotted the colonel accompanied by a thin man with curly hair and a mustache.

Colonel Potter cleared his throat, "Lt. Peterman. This is Dr. Sidney Freedman. He's a psychiatrist who has come here to talk to you."

Her eyes fell him, she blinked for a moment and then promptly covering up her head again. Hoping he would just go away. She imagined the scene in her mind of an army shrink telling her to forget all her training and be a good little girl and do what she is told. She wouldn't have any part of such a comedy.

Sidney cocked his head to the side, he spoke gently, "I can see you're not ready to talk just yet. How about tomorrow?"

She muttered from under the blanket, "No."

"The next day then?" Sidney asked.

"Go away," she stated.

"I would love too!" He explained, "But I can't until after we talk."

She threw him a look from her passive stance, "Then you will be waiting a while."

Sidney sat himself down on the closet cot, "Okay, I have all day."

She pulled the covers back her head and rolled on her side. Conveniently placing her back to him.

She muttered, "Suit yourself."

Potter patted Sidney on the shoulder, "I see you have your work cut out for you here." He slipped away quietly leaving the new doctor and his patient.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Captains BJ Hunnicutt and Hawkeye Pierce were rather busy getting ready for their well earned 3 day pass to Tokyo. Bags were packed and loaded on the jeep. Dressed to perfection in brown uniforms toped with officer's visor caps.

Charles Winchester couldn't wait to get rid of the pair. He looked forward to 3 days of silence in the swamp. Standing by the jeep to send the party away on a Bon Voyage trip with an uncanny smile.

Hawkeye had reservations about leaving with one of his patents in recovery from a massive chest wound, the very patient that Frankie Peterman had warned him about. Though the boy seemed stable for the time an injury to a main artery could be a ticking time bomb, erupting at any given time so soon after surgery.

He instructed insuring, "Keep an eye on Glendale for me."

"Indubitably," Charles replied. "Not to worry. He's in the best possible hands."

"I guess Charles's hands will have to do," Hunnicutt smirked.

Keeping his ego in tow the surgeon replied, "The only hands greater than mine would be a top notch cardiac vascular surgeon and since this unit has none, a top notch thoracic surgeon will do rather nicely." He looked at his wrist watch, "Oh, look at the time. My, my…You two boys will miss your train."

Hawkeye smirked back, "Yes Dad."

Placing the gear in drive BJ gripped the wheel. Desperate to leave the unit before having enough time to change his mind, "Have fun, Charles."

The Major nodded, "I most certainly will. I look forward to calm, soothing quiet away from the two of you."

"We'll miss you too," Hawkeye sneered back. "Driver?" He motioned for BJ to start the journey.

"Bye Charles," BJ eased off the clutch and they started to roll. Quietly leaving the camp during the stillness of chaos. He stated to Hawkeye as they left the perimeter, "I'm sure Charles can handle that kid if anything goes."

"I know," Pierce agreed. He glanced back over his shoulder at the bustling camp. Though there was a projected ceasefire approaching he felt funny about leaving his sick patient behind. Gathering his gumption before changing his mind. "Let's go Beege. Tokyo is waiting."

The jeep sped out of sight as Charles watched them leave. He rubbed his hand together.

"Finally some peace and quiet."

**HQ**

Colonel Sherman Potter listened carefully to what was being said on the other side of the phone. Letting out a breath he slowly began to speak.

"I understand, Colonel. I'll have a surgeon and a nurse over there in a jiffy. Not to worry."

Klinger didn't like the sound of the conversation. Only two surgeons were left in the camp with Hunnicutt and Pierce away on leave. He knew before the Colonel could speak a private word to him that the MASH unit was in serious trouble.

The Colonel nodded slowly as he positioned himself to hang up the phone, "I appreciate that, Colonel. It's not an issue. Over and out." His wrinkled hand gently laid the receiver down in the cradle. Letting out a puff of air and then turning to his clerk. "I know Klinger. Not a word."

"Sir, you can't send Winchester to the 8063rd. That would only leave you here."

"The whole camp is down with food poisoning, Klinger. They have no doctor right now. We're the closest MASH. I have to send Winchester and Houlihan. Too bad Pierce and Hunnicutt already left."

"But Sir!" Klinger pleaded. "That would leave you alone."

"I'm aware of that, Corporal. We're supposed to be entering a cease-fire. Hopefully no one will start shooting again till this food poisoning issue at the 8063rd can be sorted out. Most the wounded will be shipped out this afternoon. I'll just have Pierce's patient."

Even with reassurance Klinger still sounded like a worried mother hen. "Sir, I still don't like it. My gut tells me this is a mistake."

"I'm not too found of the idea of being the sole surgeon here either, Klinger. But right now the 8063rd has no surgeon that is healthy enough to work. I have to send Winchester. See if you can get on the horn and intercept Pierce and Hunnicutt before they get to Tokyo. Try to get'em back here."

Klinger grabbed the receiver and gave a nod, "Will do, Sir."

**Nurses Tent**

She remained under the covers for the entire day. Frankie could hear the coming and going of trucks and jeeps; the bustling of the nurses, doctors and enlisted outside but had no idea what was really going on. She wondered if the "shrink" they sent had left. Perhaps he had given up and gone back to his cushy office far away from the front? She thought about peeking out from under her covers. Not just to make sure the coast was clear but also due to another pressing matter. She had to go to the latrine very badly.

Pulling the covers down she looked about. Her eyes suddenly landed on the man still sitting on the edge of the cot near by.

Freedman smiled slightly and stated, "Good evening. Are you ready to talk now?"

"No," She replied. However the need of relieving herself was getting stronger. She pushed herself up in the bed. "I have to go pee."

"By all means," Sidney replied. "Don't let me stop you."

"I need to go to the latrine," she barked.

"Understandable," Sidney agreed.

Undeterred she threw the blanket back and swung her feet over the side. Grabbing her trousers she remarked, "You plan on following me there too?"

"I like to think of it as escorting my patient."

With the grace of a three-legged elephant she managed to place herself in her uniform.

She barked at him, "Couldn't at least give me a little privacy, huh?"

"You got dressed so fast I didn't have time too."

"Men," she huffed.

Sidney found the statement intriguing. He asked, "Does me being a man bother you?"

"Currently," she remarked. "I'm going to the john now. You can come along if you really want too. However, it won't be a pretty sight."

"I'll wait outside," he informed.

"Suit yourself." She stood up and marched right out of the tent. She stopped and looked about the camp. Noting that it seemed to have quiet down from the earlier flurry of activity.

Sidney stopped right behind her.

He remarked, "Things have quieted down."

"No shit, Sherlock!" She shot him a look and then marched herself across the compound right to the latrine.

Sidney stood and watched. He muttered, "Taming of the shrew."

A jeep pulled up next to him. Majors Winchester and Houlihan were packed and ready for their trip.

The head nurse asked, "How's it going with Peterman?"

"She finally got out of bed."

"That's good," Charles replied. "See Margaret, nothing to worry about. Sidney will have her up and back on duty in no time."

"She got up to go pee," the physiatrist added.

The doctor paused. He thought hard for something to say.

"Yes, but it's a start," he chirped.

Sidney informed them of his plan. "I'm gonna suggest she have something to eat. Sometimes people open up over food. She's pretty angry about something."

"Any idea what?" Major Houlihan asked.

"Not yet. It has something to do with men though."

"Well," Houlihan replied. "If it was Pierce's flirting I could at least understand that. But she was like this when she arrived."

"I don't think it's anyone here that is making her angry." Freedman looked upon the pair. "I hear the 8063rd is in trouble."

"Food poisoning," Charles replied.

The physiatrist made a face, "That doesn't sound like much fun."

"It won't be," Major Houlihan informed. "I'm not looking forward to the gut wrenching pain and vomit."

Charles added, "Neither am I. But we need to find the cause of this and make sure it's not in the army supply lines."

"Yeah," Sidney agreed. "Don't want a bunch of units getting food poisoning."

"We certainly don't," Charles agreed.

Houlihan added, "We have to go now. Good luck with Peterman."

Sidney lifted his eyebrows, "Thanks."

Charles snickered, "You're gonna need it." He placed the jeep in gear and off the pair drove.

Sidney watched as they drove out of sight, "You can say that again." He started to stroll over to the latrine to await his patient's emergence.

**Somewhere in Korea**

Hawkeye Pierce and BJ Hunnicutt drove around a bend and were suddenly confronted with a roadblock and an armed MP. They stopped at the barricade wondering what was happening. A young man approached the two doctors.

He waved to them, "Sorry Sirs. You can't go pass."

BJ asked, "Why? We're on leave to Tokyo."

"Bridge is out. We think a small band of North Koreans are filtering through the frontline and taking out structures."

"But we have to get to Tokyo," Hawkeye stated. "Anyway around?"

"Yes Sir." He pointed behind the jeep. "If you go back about a half mile you take a right. Then go east for another mile and take a left. Then turn right after you travel ten miles. Then you will come to a fork in the road. Veer left and take that to a riverbed. It's dry so you can cross it. Then go about twenty miles west till you come to a crossroad. Take the road with no arrow sign and that will lead into the back way."

"Um," Pierce looked at him. "Go where?"

The MP started all over again. "Go back about a half mile. Then turn…"

BJ cut him off, "I got it! I got it!" He placed the jeep in reverse, backed up and proceeded to turn the jeep around.

The young man looked as they drove back around the bend. He muttered to himself, "Or was it a left?"

**Mess Tent**

Eating did sound like a good idea to the shrewd doctor. She found herself sitting at a table with Sidney Freedman, Father Mulcahy, Corporal Max Klinger and Colonel Sherman Potter.

It wasn't the quiet set up that Sidney had imagined for his quiet talk to get Frankie Peterman to open up. But at least she wasn't in bed, hiding under the covers.

Frankie soon realized certain people were gone.

She asked aloud, "Where did all the other doctors go? Where is Houlihan?"

Potter replied, "Hunnicutt and Pierce left for some R&R. Been trying to get a hold of them. Apparently some enemy troops have sabotaging bridges. Don't know where they are. Winchester and Houlihan had to go to the 8063rd for a major case of food poisoning. Hopefully they can get a handle on that."

"You're here alone?" Frankie sounded concerned.

"Afraid so."

"I'm still suspended?"

"For now," Potter confirmed. "As long as things remain quiet there isn't much for you to do anyways. Things pick up and I will need all the nurses I can get."

She secretly hoped he would say he would employ her as a surgeon in this desperate time. But instead he stated he would need "nurses." Another verbal blow for the doctor, to Frankie the old man seemed to cast her abilities as a surgeon aside in favor of reinforcing the job of nursing. He would rather have her act like a nurse than do her job as a surgeon even with no one else left to operate. It bugged her. She scowled and picked at her food. Not hungry enough to actually eat anything.

Sidney picked up on the face, her lack of appetite and her general body language.

"You're upset about coming back to work as a nurse?"

It was unbelievable to Frankie. How could she not be upset after all the hoodwinking she endured? She shot him a look.

"What do you think, Sherlock?"

The table fell quiet. No one knew just how to respond to the situation. Sidney chose his words carefully.

"You're obviously upset that you're a nurse. May I ask why you went into nursing if you didn't want to be a nurse? It would make more sense if you had gone into another career. The army didn't make you become a nurse. You weren't drafted. You joined up as a nurse. I think you're misplacing the anger you have with yourself onto the army."

Her jaw dropped. "You're a shrink, right?" She waved her hand about. "Did you graduate last in your class? Tell me doc, what is the color of sky in your world? Didn't you even bother to read my file before coming up with a statement as dumb as that?"

Colonel Potter took the initiative, "First you do not speak to a senior officer in such a manner. I can have you doing KP for that for the rest of the war. Next, they didn't send your education records in your file. It's blank!"

Her mouth dropped again. For a moment she sat and processed the information, "You guys have no idea, do you?"

"Idea?" Sidney asked. "What don't we know?"

Her mind churned the betrayal. Not only to her but also to the very unit she sent too. They had no idea she was a surgeon. No idea she was hoodwinked into joining the nursing corps. They had no idea. Her anger boiled. Taking the fork she jammed it in the mystery meat for the evening and stood up.

She proclaimed, "I'm gonna kill that fucking recruiter." She then looked at Potter. "You can put me on KP duty for the rest of the war. At least that way we would have something that resembles actual food to eat." She then marched out of the hall to upset to say anything more.

Potter was about to follow her when Sidney stopped him, "I will talk to her. Stay here. She is upset with the army."

Father Mulcahy let out a breath, "Hell have no fury like a woman scorned."

Klinger asked, "You don't suppose she's one of them lady doctors?"

Placing a bit of mystery meat in his mouth the old colonel replied, "The army doesn't allow lady doctors to join. Only nurses who have their own corps."

Klinger wondered, "How would the army get a lady doctor to become a nurse?"

No one had any reasoning for such a situation. Potter played with his food. Slowly eating a little while many had no appetite at all.

"She would have been hoodwinked," He simply stated. If the implications for Potter were gut wrenching. He started to feel torn between the ethic the army preached and a young woman who might have been severely wronged.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Captains BJ Hunnicutt and Hawkeye Pierce were rather busy getting ready for their well earned 3 day pass to Tokyo. Bags were packed and loaded on the jeep. Dressed to perfection in brown uniforms toped with officer's visor caps.

Charles Winchester couldn't wait to get rid of the pair. He looked forward to 3 days of silence in the swamp. Standing by the jeep to send the party away on a Bon Voyage trip with an uncanny smile.

Hawkeye had reservations about leaving with one of his patents in recovery from a massive chest wound, the very patient that Frankie Peterman had warned him about. Though the boy seemed stable for the time an injury to a main artery could be a ticking time bomb, erupting at any given time so soon after surgery.

He instructed insuring, "Keep an eye on Glendale for me."

"Indubitably," Charles replied. "Not to worry. He's in the best possible hands."

"I guess Charles's hands will have to do," Hunnicutt smirked.

Keeping his ego in tow the surgeon replied, "The only hands greater than mine would be a top notch cardiac vascular surgeon and since this unit has none, a top notch thoracic surgeon will do rather nicely." He looked at his wrist watch, "Oh, look at the time. My, my…You two boys will miss your train."

Hawkeye smirked back, "Yes Dad."

Placing the gear in drive BJ gripped the wheel. Desperate to leave the unit before having enough time to change his mind, "Have fun, Charles."

The Major nodded, "I most certainly will. I look forward to calm, soothing quiet away from the two of you."

"We'll miss you too," Hawkeye sneered back. "Driver?" He motioned for BJ to start the journey.

"Bye Charles," BJ eased off the clutch and they started to roll. Quietly leaving the camp during the stillness of chaos. He stated to Hawkeye as they left the perimeter, "I'm sure Charles can handle that kid if anything goes."

"I know," Pierce agreed. He glanced back over his shoulder at the bustling camp. Though there was a projected ceasefire approaching he felt funny about leaving his sick patient behind. Gathering his gumption before changing his mind. "Let's go Beege. Tokyo is waiting."

The jeep sped out of sight as Charles watched them leave. He rubbed his hand together.

"Finally some peace and quiet."

**HQ**

Colonel Sherman Potter listened carefully to what was being said on the other side of the phone. Letting out a breath he slowly began to speak.

"I understand, Colonel. I'll have a surgeon and a nurse over there in a jiffy. Not to worry."

Klinger didn't like the sound of the conversation. Only two surgeons were left in the camp with Hunnicutt and Pierce away on leave. He knew before the Colonel could speak a private word to him that the MASH unit was in serious trouble.

The Colonel nodded slowly as he positioned himself to hang up the phone, "I appreciate that, Colonel. It's not an issue. Over and out." His wrinkled hand gently laid the receiver down in the cradle. Letting out a puff of air and then turning to his clerk. "I know Klinger. Not a word."

"Sir, you can't send Winchester to the 8063rd. That would only leave you here."

"The whole camp is down with food poisoning, Klinger. They have no doctor right now. We're the closest MASH. I have to send Winchester and Houlihan. Too bad Pierce and Hunnicutt already left."

"But Sir!" Klinger pleaded. "That would leave you alone."

"I'm aware of that, Corporal. We're supposed to be entering a cease-fire. Hopefully no one will start shooting again till this food poisoning issue at the 8063rd can be sorted out. Most the wounded will be shipped out this afternoon. I'll just have Pierce's patient."

Even with reassurance Klinger still sounded like a worried mother hen. "Sir, I still don't like it. My gut tells me this is a mistake."

"I'm not too found of the idea of being the sole surgeon here either, Klinger. But right now the 8063rd has no surgeon that is healthy enough to work. I have to send Winchester. See if you can get on the horn and intercept Pierce and Hunnicutt before they get to Tokyo. Try to get'em back here."

Klinger grabbed the receiver and gave a nod, "Will do, Sir."

**Nurses Tent**

She remained under the covers for the entire day. Frankie could hear the coming and going of trucks and jeeps; the bustling of the nurses, doctors and enlisted outside but had no idea what was really going on. She wondered if the "shrink" they sent had left. Perhaps he had given up and gone back to his cushy office far away from the front? She thought about peeking out from under her covers. Not just to make sure the coast was clear but also due to another pressing matter. She had to go to the latrine very badly.

Pulling the covers down she looked about. Her eyes suddenly landed on the man still sitting on the edge of the cot near by.

Freedman smiled slightly and stated, "Good evening. Are you ready to talk now?"

"No," She replied. However the need of relieving herself was getting stronger. She pushed herself up in the bed. "I have to go pee."

"By all means," Sidney replied. "Don't let me stop you."

"I need to go to the latrine," she barked.

"Understandable," Sidney agreed.

Undeterred she threw the blanket back and swung her feet over the side. Grabbing her trousers she remarked, "You plan on following me there too?"

"I like to think of it as escorting my patient."

With the grace of a three-legged elephant she managed to place herself in her uniform.

She barked at him, "Couldn't at least give me a little privacy, huh?"

"You got dressed so fast I didn't have time too."

"Men," she huffed.

Sidney found the statement intriguing. He asked, "Does me being a man bother you?"

"Currently," she remarked. "I'm going to the john now. You can come along if you really want too. However, it won't be a pretty sight."

"I'll wait outside," he informed.

"Suit yourself." She stood up and marched right out of the tent. She stopped and looked about the camp. Noting that it seemed to have quiet down from the earlier flurry of activity.

Sidney stopped right behind her.

He remarked, "Things have quieted down."

"No shit, Sherlock!" She shot him a look and then marched herself across the compound right to the latrine.

Sidney stood and watched. He muttered, "Taming of the shrew."

A jeep pulled up next to him. Majors Winchester and Houlihan were packed and ready for their trip.

The head nurse asked, "How's it going with Peterman?"

"She finally got out of bed."

"That's good," Charles replied. "See Margaret, nothing to worry about. Sidney will have her up and back on duty in no time."

"She got up to go pee," the physiatrist added.

The doctor paused. He thought hard for something to say.

"Yes, but it's a start," he chirped.

Sidney informed them of his plan. "I'm gonna suggest she have something to eat. Sometimes people open up over food. She's pretty angry about something."

"Any idea what?" Major Houlihan asked.

"Not yet. It has something to do with men though."

"Well," Houlihan replied. "If it was Pierce's flirting I could at least understand that. But she was like this when she arrived."

"I don't think it's anyone here that is making her angry." Freedman looked upon the pair. "I hear the 8063rd is in trouble."

"Food poisoning," Charles replied.

The physiatrist made a face, "That doesn't sound like much fun."

"It won't be," Major Houlihan informed. "I'm not looking forward to the gut wrenching pain and vomit."

Charles added, "Neither am I. But we need to find the cause of this and make sure it's not in the army supply lines."

"Yeah," Sidney agreed. "Don't want a bunch of units getting food poisoning."

"We certainly don't," Charles agreed.

Houlihan added, "We have to go now. Good luck with Peterman."

Sidney lifted his eyebrows, "Thanks."

Charles snickered, "You're gonna need it." He placed the jeep in gear and off the pair drove.

Sidney watched as they drove out of sight, "You can say that again." He started to stroll over to the latrine to await his patient's emergence.

**Somewhere in Korea**

Hawkeye Pierce and BJ Hunnicutt drove around a bend and were suddenly confronted with a roadblock and an armed MP. They stopped at the barricade wondering what was happening. A young man approached the two doctors.

He waved to them, "Sorry Sirs. You can't go pass."

BJ asked, "Why? We're on leave to Tokyo."

"Bridge is out. We think a small band of North Koreans are filtering through the frontline and taking out structures."

"But we have to get to Tokyo," Hawkeye stated. "Anyway around?"

"Yes Sir." He pointed behind the jeep. "If you go back about a half mile you take a right. Then go east for another mile and take a left. Then turn right after you travel ten miles. Then you will come to a fork in the road. Veer left and take that to a riverbed. It's dry so you can cross it. Then go about twenty miles west till you come to a crossroad. Take the road with no arrow sign and that will lead into the back way."

"Um," Pierce looked at him. "Go where?"

The MP started all over again. "Go back about a half mile. Then turn…"

BJ cut him off, "I got it! I got it!" He placed the jeep in reverse, backed up and proceeded to turn the jeep around.

The young man looked as they drove back around the bend. He muttered to himself, "Or was it a left?"

**Mess Tent**

Eating did sound like a good idea to the shrewd doctor. She found herself sitting at a table with Sidney Freedman, Father Mulcahy, Corporal Max Klinger and Colonel Sherman Potter.

It wasn't the quiet set up that Sidney had imagined for his quiet talk to get Frankie Peterman to open up. But at least she wasn't in bed, hiding under the covers.

Frankie soon realized certain people were gone.

She asked aloud, "Where did all the other doctors go? Where is Houlihan?"

Potter replied, "Hunnicutt and Pierce left for some R&R. Been trying to get a hold of them. Apparently some enemy troops have sabotaging bridges. Don't know where they are. Winchester and Houlihan had to go to the 8063rd for a major case of food poisoning. Hopefully they can get a handle on that."

"You're here alone?" Frankie sounded concerned.

"Afraid so."

"I'm still suspended?"

"For now," Potter confirmed. "As long as things remain quiet there isn't much for you to do anyways. Things pick up and I will need all the nurses I can get."

She secretly hoped he would say he would employ her as a surgeon in this desperate time. But instead he stated he would need "nurses." Another verbal blow for the doctor, to Frankie the old man seemed to cast her abilities as a surgeon aside in favor of reinforcing the job of nursing. He would rather have her act like a nurse than do her job as a surgeon even with no one else left to operate. It bugged her. She scowled and picked at her food. Not hungry enough to actually eat anything.

Sidney picked up on the face, her lack of appetite and her general body language.

"You're upset about coming back to work as a nurse?"

It was unbelievable to Frankie. How could she not be upset after all the hoodwinking she endured? She shot him a look.

"What do you think, Sherlock?"

The table fell quiet. No one knew just how to respond to the situation. Sidney chose his words carefully.

"You're obviously upset that you're a nurse. May I ask why you went into nursing if you didn't want to be a nurse? It would make more sense if you had gone into another career. The army didn't make you become a nurse. You weren't drafted. You joined up as a nurse. I think you're misplacing the anger you have with yourself onto the army."

Her jaw dropped. "You're a shrink, right?" She waved her hand about. "Did you graduate last in your class? Tell me doc, what is the color of sky in your world? Didn't you even bother to read my file before coming up with a statement as dumb as that?"

Colonel Potter took the initiative, "First you do not speak to a senior officer in such a manner. I can have you doing KP for that for the rest of the war. Next, they didn't send your education records in your file. It's blank!"

Her mouth dropped again. For a moment she sat and processed the information, "You guys have no idea, do you?"

"Idea?" Sidney asked. "What don't we know?"

Her mind churned the betrayal. Not only to her but also to the very unit she sent too. They had no idea she was a surgeon. No idea she was hoodwinked into joining the nursing corps. They had no idea. Her anger boiled. Taking the fork she jammed it in the mystery meat for the evening and stood up.

She proclaimed, "I'm gonna kill that fucking recruiter." She then looked at Potter. "You can put me on KP duty for the rest of the war. At least that way we would have something that resembles actual food to eat." She then marched out of the hall to upset to say anything more.

Potter was about to follow her when Sidney stopped him, "I will talk to her. Stay here. She is upset with the army."

Father Mulcahy let out a breath, "Hell have no fury like a woman scorned."

Klinger asked, "You don't suppose she's one of them lady doctors?"

Placing a bit of mystery meat in his mouth the old colonel replied, "The army doesn't allow lady doctors to join. Only nurses who have their own corps."

Klinger wondered, "How would the army get a lady doctor to become a nurse?"

No one had any reasoning for such a situation. Potter played with his food. Slowly eating a little while many had no appetite at all.

"She would have been hoodwinked," He simply stated. If the implications for Potter were gut wrenching. He started to feel torn between the ethic the army preached and a young woman who might have been severely wronged.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

**8063****rd**

Pierce and Hunnicutt found a familiar sight. Though, it wasn't the sight they had hoped for. Instead of the glimmering lights of Tokyo they had the dim lights of another MASH unit.

BJ mentioned, "It's not home but it'll do."

"Anything will do," Hawkeye agreed.

The jeep rolled into camp and pulled along the side of the clerk's office, BJ wondered, "Where is everyone?"

Hawkeye shrugged, "Don't know. Let's see who is minding the store."

Climbing out of the jeep the pair wandered into the office only to discover Majors Houlihan and Winchester. The head nurse had just hung up the radio receiver upon their entrance.

Winchester's face lit up in surprise, "Did Colonel Potter send the two of you here? I assure you Margaret and I have a handle on things?"

"We took a wrong turn and got lost," Hawkeye explained. "The main road out was sabotaged by North Koreans. What's going on?"

"You don't know?" Houlihan asked in surprise.

"Know what?" Hawkeye seemed ever as confused as usual.

She waved her arm. "The whole camp has food poisoning. Charles and I are trying to trace the source. We think it's in the army supply lines."

"In the supply lines?" Hawkeye couldn't believe his ears. "You sure?"

She held out a clipboard with a paper. "I've been on the horn with every MASH unit, every depot and every base this side of Korea. A number of units have fallen ill. I'm over lapping the supplies received and looking for a common batch number. I think I found it. This lot number here. It's canned meat product. The whole batch might be contaminated. I've traced food poisoning to every camp, unit and outpost this batch went too."

Concerned BJ asked, "Did it go to the 4077th?"

"I have to get a hold of Klinger to find out!" Houlihan told them. "If it has they need to pull this canned meat before it gets served. Otherwise the whole camp will be affected."

"Well," Hawkeye motioned towards the radio, "don't let us stop you."

"I just tried to call and got no answer. Colonel Potter sent us here after you two left for you leave. He was going to call ahead and intercept you and have you sent back to camp. If you two are here then he's alone."

"We better get back to camp," BJ stated. He was ready to head out the door without another thought.

"BJ," Hawkeye countered. "It's freezing out there and we didn't bring winter coats. There is enemy combatant running around blowing up bridges and we would be alone out there. Let's see if we can get Klinger on the horn first." He pointed to the radio. "Margaret, try again."

She picked up the receiver and started the procedure to contact the other MASH unit. In the distance the sound of a jeep engine could be heard. The engine came closer and finally stopped just outside the door. Major Houlihan still had no answer on the radio. Concern grew.

A young courier entered the office. He looked around for the attending corporal.

Waving a file folder the man asked, "Where's Jensen?"

Major Winchester reported, "Ill with food poisoning I'm afraid. Whole camp has it. I'm Major Charles Emerson Winchester the Third of the MASH 4077th. My colleagues: Captains Pierce and Hunnicutt. And this is Major Margaret Houlihan our head nurse. We're filling in till the camp gets on their feet."

The corporal couldn't believe his luck. Doctors from the very MASH unit he needed to get too. He explained, "Listen, I'm trying to deliver a package to Colonel Sherman Potter. The bridge over the creek is out. Can't get past it without driving the long way around. Can you guys take this for me?"

"Depends," Charles sounded rather smug. "What is it?"

"Personnel record for Second Lieutenant Frankie Peterman. I guess she's a nurse in the unit. Just need to make sure he gets this."

Major Houlihan held out her hands for the record. It was like a gift had fallen from the sky and into her lap. All the answers to her questions lay in that package.

She stated, "I'm Peterman's commanding officer. I'll take that."

"Here you go ma'am," He was relieved to be rid of the package. He then asked, "Everyone got food poisoning?"

Charles told him, "Don't eat any canned meat for a while."

"Really, thanks for the heads up."

"The creek bridge is out?" BJ wasn't sure if he heard correctly.

"Yes sir," The courier replied. He turned to leave, "Thanks for taking that package. I can go back to base now. Good night captains, majors." He gave a slight salute before disappearing into the frigid night.

All eyes suddenly fell on the records. For a moment they stared in complete silence as if waiting for some event to happen.

Hawkeye finally asked, "Should we open it?"

Charles suggested, "It is for Colonel Potter to read."

Houlihan stated as she tore into the package, "I'm the head nurse. She is one of my nurses and I am going to open it!" She removed the file folder and stood stunned as she read the info. "She's a doctor!"

"What?" Hawkeye cranked his head around to see the pages.

The nurse read the information before her, "She's a graduate of Saint Mary's Medical School for Women. She specialized in cardiology. Was the head surgeon in the school's hospital. I don't see any nursing schools listed at all. Graduated first in her class."

"What is she doing as a nurse?" BJ wondered.

Houlihan added, "She has no nursing experience or school. Why did the corps even accept her?"

"Why didn't she try for the medical corps?" Hawkeye wondered.

The situation sunk into Major Houlihan's mind, slowly she replied, "The medical corps doesn't accept women."

"Then how did she get in?" Winchester wondered. "If the Army Medical Corps doesn't accept women doctors and she's not qualified to be a nurse than how did she even get into the system?"

"Something is screwy there." BJ admitted. "So, she's not a nurse who is pretending to be a doctor."

Hawkeye stated, "More like a doctor pretending to be a nurse. And a bad one at that."

"Ya think she was tricked?" BJ wondered aloud.

Major Houlihan found herself getting angry. Not because Lt. Peterman's work or her general state of contention but rather because the only way the doctor could be working as a nurse is if she was tricked. The only reason she was tricked is due to gender policy. Suddenly all the years of proving she could fit into any man's army hit her square in the chest.

It was bad enough with the way nurses were treated. Never quiet equal to their male counterparts. Always sighted that doctors had more education and thus demanded more pay, more respect and more opportunity. That was obviously not the case. A woman with equal education tricked into taking a lower class job due to her gender.

Margaret stated, "Of course she was tricked! How dare a woman be as good as a doctor as a man? That's unheard of in the army."

Hawkeye still couldn't figure out the aspect of Peterman's anger. He wondered aloud. "Why was she so upset with us? We could have helped her. She never said anything. Why is she mad at us…At me?"

Houlihan retaliated, "She probably hates your flirting with other nurses. I have no idea why she didn't say anything." Throwing the folder down on the desk Houlihan picked up the radio receiver and started a third attempt to contact her unit.

"Who are you calling?" Hawkeye demanded.

"Camp," She replied. "Someone has to answer. Come on Klinger…Pick up the phone."

The nasally voice of a familiar corporal pierced the speaker. It was music to the nurse's ear. "MASH 4077th." Klinger stated.

"Klinger," Houlihan sounded relived. "Thank god you're there."

"Major Houlihan!" Klinger replied. "How the heck are you?" He resisted pouring out the information that tempted his lips.

"I'm fine, Klinger. Listen, I need to check the batch numbers on the invoices for some meat. We think an entire lot is contaminated. It's getting everyone sick."

"You found the source?" His voice sounded surprised and relived all at once. "What are the codes? The whole unit has food poisoning."

"The whole unit already has it?" Margaret rolled his eyes in defeat. She was too late. Everything she worked so hard to avoid had already happened. "Potter?"

"Potter too," Klinger confirmed. "But not everyone has it. A few of us are still doing okay."

"Who?"

"Dr Freedman, myself, Nurse Kellye, Father Mulcahy and Frankie Peterman."

"Peterman is okay?" With the whole camp down with food poisoning and no army doctor available even the news of a disgruntle doctor being well was welcome news.

"Yep!" he stated busting at the seams.

"Okay, Klinger. I just got Peterman's file from ICOR. She's a doctor and the only doctor you have right now. Hunnicutt and Pierce got lost and are here with Charles and me. The bridge from the 8063rd to the 4077th has been blown out. The army thinks there are North Koreans behind our line blowing things up. You will need to set up sentry duty and tell Peterman she has to act like a doctor now till we can get back and sort this mess out."

"Oh, she already took over being a doctor. She had to operate on Pierce's patient. We just got out of OR. Plus she's overseeing the recovery for our own people who have food poisoning."

Houlihan gapped for moment at the news. "You know she's a doctor? She told you?"

"She told Dr. Freedman. She thought we all knew and didn't like her for it. He told her we didn't get any of her records. It was a misunderstanding."

"More like she was hoodwinked!" Houlihan stated.

"She said the recruiter lied to her." Max Klinger agreed. "What's the lot number of the contaminated meat? Frankie and Dr. Freedman were talking about finding the source. This would help us out here."

"22874590," The major stated. She looked at the three surgeons standing around her. "Keep us up to date, Klinger."

"Will do, Major."

She hung up the receiver and looked at the prying eyes. "Freedman is helping her. Peterman and Sidney are running the camp."

"Do either know anything about running a MASH unit?" Charles wondered.

"Do any of us?" Hawkeye asked.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

**MASH 4077****th**

Klinger had rushed into the recovery ward with the news he received from Major Houlihan. He found Dr. Peterman slumped over a pile of paperwork on the desk. Her coffee cup long cold, a pen precariously balanced on her fingertips. He paused for a moment. He really didn't wish to wake her up but Dr Peterman was now the chief medical officer in the entire camp.

He knelt down to ear level and gently spoke, "Dr. Peterman. Frankie. Wakie, wakie. I have the source of the food poisoning."

She lifted her groggy head, blinking sporadically, "What?"

"I just spoke to Major Houlihan. She found the source of the food poisoning. It's canned mystery meat. I have the codes. We have to pull any from the storage."

She looked at him, "And you need me to do what?"

"You're now the chief here. You need to give the orders."

"But you already told me what to do," Frankie muttered.

Klinger agreed, "I did. However, we also have to place someone on guard duty. There are enemy combatants blowing things up. And we need to pull the contaminated meat. You need to decide who does what. Who pulls the meat? Who takes sentry duty? Who stays with the patients? You have to do all that now. At least till Colonel Potter gets back on his feet."

She took a deep breath, her mind started to churn. Very few were still able to do the task needed. At least one medically qualified person needed top stay with the recovering patients.

"Okay, you take guard duty. Father Mulcahy and I will pull the meat. Nurse Kellye can watch the recovery ward. Have Sidney keep his ears near the horn."

"Aye, aye Captain…I mean lieutenant." He handed her a slip of paper, "This is the lot number for the contaminated meat."

She took the paper and glanced at it, she asked in thought, "Enemy combatants?"

"They blew up some bridges," Klinger confirmed.

"Be careful, Klinger."

"Don't worry about me. I'm form Toledo."

"The North Koreans don't care where you're from."

**8063****rd**

With Major Winchester pulling rank the two captains were reduced to guard duty at the 8063rd. Neither was much of a guard. After driving endlessly all day the last thing Pierce nor Hunnicutt wanted was a endless night of playing: "Who goes there?"

"Can you believe this?" Hawkeye whined. "Majors Winchester and Houlihan get to stay all night in a warm recovery ward taking turns napping while we get to walk around in the cold night air. I swear I'm getting frost bite."

BJ kept his hands shoved in his pockets. "I swear my toes are frozen solid. My fingers not far behind."

"My behind is frozen solid," Hawkeye added. "What kind of sane enemy combatant would run around blowing things up in this weather?"

"One that likes the cold?"

The pair stopped dead in their tracks. In the motor compound was an unusual looking contraption stuck to a large barrel of fuel. Their eyes followed the workings of the device till it was painfully obvious they were looking at a ticking time bomb.

"Is that what I think it is?" BJ asked.

"Know anything about defusing bombs, Beege?" The doctor started to shift his weight anxiously.

"Nope, slept through that part of basic training."

"Yeah, me too." They slowly back away. The 4077th chief surgeon screamed out, "Margaret."

**4077****th**

Frankie and the Father were nearly completed with their task. Cans of contaminated meats filled sacks to be sent to ICOR for further analysis. Obviously a full-scale investigation would need to be preformed to prevent another catastrophe. Trying to pass the time and stay awake the Father made small talk with his newest doctor to the camp.

"Well, Dr Peterman. Do you think you will be staying in the nurses tent or perhaps you will get your own private quarters?"

"Why would I get private quarters?" She wondered. "I'm just a lieutenant."

"No, you are not just a lieutenant. You are the first lady doctor in a MASH unit ever. I think you should get your own tent."

"Wouldn't that make Larry, Curly and Moe and bit jealous?" She wondered.

He snickered at the joke. "Oh, Pierce, Hunnicutt and Winchester. Of course not, they would understand a lady needs her space."

"I think I'm fine in the nurse's tent." She threw another can in the sack. "Besides, the guys don't get their own tents. Why should I?"

"Well, they do have their own tent. The Swamp!"

Her nose wrinkled, "That place is disgusting. Maybe they would get jealous?"

He too threw in some cans of meat, "I'm just saying it would be beneficial to you to get the army to recognize you as a doctor if you are not living with the nurses. Makes it more authentic. A lady doctor's tent." He chuckled. "Perhaps you could call it the Park. The Swamp; The Park."

"Yeah, cute Father." She shook her head. "I'm fine with the other ladies that are not doctors. But thanks anyways."

"Well, if you change your mind I know a few strings I could pull to get your that lady doctor's tent."

"I appreciate that, Father. But let's face it. With my luck, I would end up with a pup tent."

"Nonsense!" He exclaimed. "I've got friends in high places. If you know what I mean." He glanced up towards the direction of the sky.

"I think he has bigger problems than my pup tent to worry about."

"And the meek shall inherit the earth," he recited.

Klinger suddenly barges into the storage tent. "Dr Peterman. We got wounded."

She paused and looked at him. She prayed it was some sort of joke but the look on Klinger's face told her otherwise.

"Where?"

"Ambulance pulled in with a full load," He said anxiously as they left the tent.

Her eyes fell on a couple of medics unloading the litters of wounded, one of the men asked, "Where are all the doctors?"

Frankie spouted, "I'm it! How many you got?"

"A dozen! Another ambulance is coming." The medic replied. "You're a doctor, Lady?"

She quickly assessed the wounded man before her, "Get to pre-op." Looking up to the young man's hazel eyes and assured him. "Yes, I'm a doctor. I'm really short handed. The whole camp has food poisoning. Can you stay and help?"

"I'll have to radio my CO."

"Do that! But first we need to get the wounded unloaded." She looked at Mulcahy, "Get to the horn and tell ICOR not to send any more wounded here. We only have one doctor."

The medic sounded, "You're the only MASH unit that we can get too. The enemy has taken out a bunch of bridges."

She looked back at the Father. "Tell ICOR we need a chopper to evac wounded to other hospitals."

"I'm on it," The father jogged off.

Frankie made her way to the next patient, a young man missing both his legs. He looked at her as she looked him over.

He asked, "Am I gonna die?"

Boldly she looked him square in the eye. His blood loss was massive and she really didn't have a true answer.

"Not on my watch," Was all she could muster. She barked to the medic, "Pre-op now." She quickly went on to the next still seeing the image of the former in her mind. The next one was just as sever but unconscious.

She gulped and then stuck her head into the back of the ambulance. Rows of men lined up to be examined and fixed like an assembly line of human beings. Parts missing, moaning and groaning. She could hear the distinct sound of a collapsing lung as the air escaped the chest cavity from deep within the vehicle, a gurgling, sucking sound that drove a knot in her stomach.

Soon she found herself hopping into the ambulance, dictating orders and examining patient after patient, mentally lining up and order of operation. Reaching into her pocket she retrieved a red lipstick. She found the makeup handy when doing triage as a nurse.

But this time she wrote a large number one on the man's forehead, "He goes first."

Her next patient was already dead. Didn't make the ride to the field hospital. She marked a simple "D" in the forehead.

Pointing to the medic she told him, "He's gone. The numbers are the order of which I will operate. D is for deceased. M is for mortal wound. If you find an M make the patient comfortable. There is nothing I can do for them. Cover up the deceased."

"Yes ma'am," The medic agreed.


	7. Chapter 7

-1Chapter 7

**8063rd**

The four stood with the most dumbfounded and disturbed expression gracing their faces. Hawkeye held a flashlight on the contraption. Spotting the time piece of the bomb which was ticking down towards zero.

Major Houlihan held the tools while Major Winchester grasped a small paper manual that dictated how to diffuse a bomb. The four looked rather pathetic really. Like scared children about to be thrusted onto the stage of a school Christmas musical with no clue as to their lines. None knew what they were doing and all were scared witless of the task at hand.

Looking upon his comrades Major Winchester asked the one question each was thinking. "Which one of us will get the…Glory…Of diffusing this…Bomb?"

Hawkeye gulped, "I'll do it." He then started to breath heavily on his cupped hands in an effort to chase the cold away.

Houlihan grabbed the ice cold flesh and shook her head, "You're freezing. You won't be able to do this." She reached across and grabbed BJ's hands as well. "You're both too cold to do this. Charles, you will have to snip the wires."

His eye grew wide, "Me? But I'm in charge of this little piece of paradise till the CO recovers." He could see his collaborators weren't buying his excuse. He quickly added, "My eyes can't see very well in the dark. I could cut the wrong wire."

"No one can see very well in the dark, Charles." BJ replied.

"But it's darker than normal." He whined. "Besides, the bomb doesn't look so big. Maybe if we backed away far enough it wouldn't hurt anyone when it goes off?"

"It's attached to gasoline!" The nurse stated. She then declared, "I will do it!" Directing the crew she continued. "Pierce…Hold the flashlight on the bomb. Hunnicutt and Major Winchester can walk me through it." She started to march towards the bomb. She was halfway to the goal she turned and looked upon the trio still standing back. Pausing for a moment she then asked, "Don't suppose any of you are man enough to stop me?"

The three glanced at one another. The will to survive far outweighed the will to be masculine. Hawkeye spoke for them. "Well, we all know how stubborn you are, Margaret. And you would not take 'no' for an answer anyways."

Though the answer was accurate it wasn't what she was hoping for. She rolled her eyes and exhaled. "You're right." She turned and walked up to the ticking time bomb. Squatting down to the side as to not block the light. She turned her head back to the trio who had now stepped even further back. She grimaced at the sight.

BJ held a secondary flashlight on the reading material as Winchester looked upon the diagram. Charles looked at the book and then up at his nurse. "The manual says there should be four wires. You need to cut the wire that connects to battery to the detonator."

She glanced over the bomb looking for the wires and the connections. She found a large battery and what appeared to be the detonator. Two separate wires seemed to be connecting the explosive. "I need you to be more specific. Which wire? There are two wires."

"Two wires?" The major flipped through the book. He found another page. "Says here that could be a decoy. A dummy wire and a real wire. You need to cut the real wire. The dummy wire could make the bomb go off."

"Which one do I cut?" She was getting annoyed with the situation. She tempted to go over, rip the manual out of his hands and read it herself.

"The red wire." Winchester remarked.

BJ was reading the instructions as well. He noted, "What if the red wire is the dummy wire? The enemy could have switched them."

"I have a green wire and a blue wire. I don't have a red wire." Her knees were starting to cramp up from the position. Her temper was getting short and her feet were freezing. She didn't want to be out there for hours waiting for them to read the book and yet she didn't want to get killed either. She just wanted a nice warm bed to crawl into and forget the war for a night.

The trio were equally as cold and tired but the fear of getting the major killed was eating away at their insides. Hawkeye found his stomach was turning and heartburn crept up on him. He walked closer to the bomb. So close it would kill him as well. "Don't touch anything, Margaret. Let's get a closer look at it."

Charles wanted to find a foxhole to jump into. To form some barrier between him and the bomb but also couldn't bear the thought of losing his favorite nurse in such a horrid way. "Let me look at see what it says about blue and green wires. Don't touch anything, Margaret."

"I wasn't planning on it!" Houlihan replied. She tugged on Hawkeye's jacket, "Move the light over here a bit more." She studied the wires closer trying to unravel the circuits.

He knelt down beside her holding the flashlight on the bomb wires.

"There," BJ pointed in the book. "Blue wire."

Charles nodded in agreement, "Seems the blue wire is a standard circuit wire. That's the one to cut."

Hawkeye countered, "Unless the Koreans switched them. The green wire seems to go right into the detonator."

"So does the blue wire," The major replied. She squinted, trying to get a closer look. "I think it's the blue wire."

"You sure?"

"I think so."

"Well…We have to cut it before the bomb goes off. We're running out of time."

The major placed the wire cutter on the chosen circuit. She was about to squeeze when she stopped. Doubting if it was the right wire after all. Taking a deep breath she pulled the cutters off the blue wire and went for the green. She looked at Hawkeye who was right next to her. "I think it's the green one." She told him.

Their eyes lingered for a moment. He gulped and nodded. If she was wrong they would both be killed. It could be his last chance to say what was on his mind. And for that brief moment his mind went blank. Everything he wanted to tell her escaped him. How he thought she was one of the best nurses he had ever known. How he admired her tenacity and found her to be a beacon of light in a dark stormy sea. Yet all he could say was, "Me too."

Perhaps "me too" meant more than just an agreement. A secret mutual sharing of respect and fondness between the pair. At least that's how Major Houlihan read the words. A man willing to die when he didn't have too just because she had placed her own life in danger. Actions to Major Houlihan always spoke louder than words. She nodded, "Right."

As her hand squeezed the cutters down on wire both closed their eyes. Waiting for the end to arrive. Silence was all they heard. The time piece stopped and the ticking was no more. They opened their eyes.

Hawkeye grinned, "We did it!"

"We did," Margaret agreed. She dropped the cutters, wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him near. "We did it!" She repeated.

He squeezed her tight. Holding her for just a moment and then suddenly they both pulled away from the victory hug. Never allowing themselves to get too close. Giving a fleeting glance before turning their attention to the onlookers who were equally as happy to be rid of the bomb.

**4077th**

Dr Frankie Peterman was now working on her seventh patient in what sure to be a marathon operating theater. Like a human assembly line with patient after patient just waiting to be repaired. It was gruesome work. Amputations, dissections and massive amounts of blood. Exposed bones and human organs. Frankie was beginning to wonder if she could handle the stress of that night alone. She felt like crying. Like running away and never coming back. Exhausted she wondered if she would lose her sanity? Going insane seemed like a better idea than continuing the surgeries one after another.

She desperately wished there were other doctors there to help her. Not just for physical reasons but to have someone to talk too as well. To help diffuse the stress from such a task. She found herself more isolated than before. Even though the other nurses and doctors didn't seem to get along with her as well as she would have liked they were still there. The human connection of shared consciousness. Something they were all in together. It somehow comforting.

Though she did get two medics as assistants and was still surrounded by her small able crew headed by Max Klinger. She still needed another doctor to confide in, too work with and to have as a second set of eyes. Someone who knew exactly what it was like to perform the type of surgery in a MASH unit.

Her wish soon came true. Colonel Potter had recovered enough that he assigned himself back to active duty. Though not fully recovered the old colonel rebounded faster than his much younger counterparts. He walked into the operating room fully scrubbed and ready to work.

Frankie glanced up from the patient she worked on. She couldn't believe he was up and moving around. "Colonel?"

"I'm fine," Potter replied. He walked to the end of the stretcher. Stared at what she was doing for a moment and then looked directly at her. "I understand you're a cardiac surgeon."

"I used to be," She told him. "Now I'm a nurse."

Walking up to the patient he stood directly opposite of her. He examined the gapping wound she had been repairing. Nodding he assured, "Looks like a doctor's handiwork to me. I see you have your own suture too. Looks good."

The small talk actually helped relieve some of the anxiety she was under. A slight pat on the back from an old crusty colonel seemed to work wonders for her. She smiled under the mask. "Thank you, Sir."

"How many so far?" Potter wondered.

"He's seven," She replied.

"Klinger told me you had to operate on Piece's patient earlier too."

"Yes, Sir."

He held up his hand. "For right now. Let's drop the 'Sir.' Peterman, that makes eight surgeries in less than twelve hours. Also you have been working on an entire camp full of sick people. I think you earned your stripes on this one, Kid."

"I was never after stripes, Colonel. Just a doctor's job. I could use a hand...If you feel up to it?"

"I didn't get dressed up in the get-up to just come in here and say 'howdy.'" The Colonel gave a nod and walked down the next operating table. He gave a shout, "I need a patient here." Looking back to Frankie he added, "Let me know if you need a hand, Doctor."

"I will, Sir."

"I'll let you call 'Sherman' but we'll keep that between us." He mentioned.

She glanced back. A CO giving permission to use his first name was unheard off, especially for Colonel Potter. Proof he not only believed she was a doctor but perhaps had some admiration as well. She grinned at him. "Thank you, Sherman."

"You're welcome, Dr Peterman." He grinned back.

"Frankie," She told him.

"I never call my people by their first names," He told her. Pausing he suggested, "We'll keep that secret too."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

**Hours Later - 4077****th**

With much relief and anticipation the small jeep carrying the three doctors and the head nurse finally pulled into the 4077th. Wary from the recent events and happy they found a way past the blown bridge they didn't care that is was nearly dinner time. The familiar sight of their own unit was like coming home for the travelers.

The camp seemed to have recovered from the food poisoning. Enlisted and nurses were about the area. An ambulance was being loaded with wounded to be transferred to Tokyo. Colonel Potter had been busy directing the transportation as well as the camp in general. BJ pulled the jeep right up to Potter's feet.

The old colonel gave a welcome grin to the four, "Pierce, Hunnicutt, Majors…Glad to see ye."

Hawkeye sat right behind BJ, casually asked, "Miss us?"

"Indeed I did." His hand rested on the edge of the jeep. "Good work on finding the source of the food poisoning Majors. Otherwise we all would have been sick all over again."

"Thank you, Sir." Margaret replied.

"I heard you also found and diffused a bomb. Good work. I'll have to put your all in for a citation and maybe a little R and R."

"Well," Hawkeye became rather smug. "It was a group effort."

"Yes, R and R does sound like a just reward," Charles agreed rather smugly.

Major Houlihan was tempted to smack him for all he did was read a book. It was she and Hawkeye who actually diffused the bomb. She threw the major a dirty look and then went onto the burning question on her mind.

"How did Peterman do?"

"Like a trooper," The Colonel gave a nod. "Fine surgeon. Couldn't have done a better job myself. I had to order her to get some rest. She didn't want to leave her duties till you all got back. I understand you got her records."

Major Houlihan handed him the file. She nodded as she spoke.

"Here it is. I took the liberty of reading it. She doesn't even qualify for a nurse. Never had any nursing training whatsoever. But her medical expertise rivals Pierce."

Charles couldn't resist, "Actually her medical expertise rivals my own. She's a cardiac surgeon…A very delicate line of work. While Pierce on the hand is more of a…What's word…Ah, yes…'Meatball' surgeon."

Potter tucked the file under his arm, stuck his hands in his coat pockets and threw back his head while chuckling silently to himself, "Actually, Winchester, I've seen her do meatball surgery and she could rival Pierce." He pointed his finger at the pompous surgeon. "When she said it wasn't hard to read your mind, she wasn't kidding. And somehow I don't think she is gonna take you up on that offer to be your nurse back in Boston."

Pierce retorted, "She can't be that good."

"As a nurse she awful but as a surgeon it's a whole other story, Pierce." He stepped slightly away from the jeep. "Hunnicutt why don't you park this contraption and I see all you in the mess tent for dinner."

"Sounds good," BJ put the vehicle in gear.

As the pulled away Hawkeye puckered his lips and groaned, "She can't be better than me."

BJ snickered, "What's the matter, Hawk? Not up for a little competition?"

"From a little girl?" Charles added.

Margate snorted at them. "She is not a little girl, Major. She is a full fledged doctor who was taken advantage of by arrogant male doctors such as yourself."

"I never laid a hand on her," Charles defended.

Pierce chipped. "I tried. Funny, she just never seemed to warm up to me though."

Tired of the constant belittling Margaret stated her demands, "Okay! Listen Bozo. She was upset because she was tricked. Now treat her like one of your own and maybe she will be nicer to you." She paused and thought about what she said. "Don't treat her like one of your own. I've seen what you three do to each other. Treat her like a lady doctor. Thank you can handle that, Pierce?"

"Yes ma'am."

She shook her head, "Seriously, can't you guys be serious for even just a few minutes?"

"Nope," BJ replied. "Takes too much effort."

**Mess Hall**

Everyone had come to the dinner tent except Dr. Peterman. Sitting at their usual table the Colonel took his seat at the head of the motley crew. Joining them was also Sidney Freedman and Maxwell Klinger.

They found powdered eggs to be a welcome site after the past sickness with the tainted mystery meat. Something most had never would have actually looked forward to eating. As they chatted away and force feeding themselves the yellow substance that once resembled an egg.

Dr Peterman entered the tent after awakening from her sleep. Groggily she veered towards the smell of coffee. Something she seemed to have some addiction too.

Pierce looked on and commented, "Well hello to you too, Dr. Peterman."

"Pierce," Major Houlihan scolded. "Give her a break. She just woke up from a 36-hour shift. God sakes let her get some coffee."

Pierce shook his finger, "Ya know if I drank as much booze as she drinks coffee, I would labeled an alcoholic. How come she gets away with it?"

"Because coffee doesn't make you intoxicated," Winchester stated.

"It's a stimulant," Pierce argued.

"I think we all need our coffee to get going," BJ defended.

Dr. Peterman loaded up her tray with what she could identify as edible and turned to gaze over the seating of the tent. The nurses where sitting at one table while the officers plus the company clerk were seated at another table. She paused not knowing which table she would be welcomed at. For now she didn't seem to fit in anywhere. Not with the nurses and not with the doctors.

Klinger spotted the pause, he waved to her, "Frankie! Over here."

It was amazing how one enlisted man who had a history of wearing women's clothing had solved her problem. He had called her over to the doctor's table. Smiling she nodded and walked over to the table. Her gut wrenched upon seeing the male doctors. She still feared rejection even in the face of disclosure. But this time her fear wasn't about being treated like a nurse but rather about how she acted around men who had no idea why she was so upset.

Hawkeye was still a bit of a shrew even in the obvious nervousness the young doctor exhibited.

He muttered, "Here she comes. I bet she will give some big speech demanding she be treated like a man."

Frankie stopped at the table, stood before the troop and let out a deep exhale, "I would like to apologize to doctors Pierce, Hunnicutt, Winchester and to Major Houlihan. I assumed you all knew my medical background and agreed with army policy of not allowing woman doctors in the medical corps. I thought you were trying to punish me in some way. I had no idea none of you knew. I'm sorry for my attitude and behavior. I know I was pretty cold and I'm just really sorry I made your jobs so much harder."

She took the wind right out of Hawkeye's sails. He was ready for an argument, maybe even a standoff…But not taking responsibility and apologizing. He had obviously misjudged her more than he was willing to admit.

He motioned, "Peterman why don't you sit down?" Waited for her to comply. He wiggled slightly in his seat. Between gulps of food he asked, "So, you were a doctor pretending to be a nurse. What was it like to be on that end of the spectrum?"

Without missing a beat she blinked candidly and stated, "It's much more difficult than you know. First, it's back breaking work. If you can't stomach the small of human fecal matter this job is not for you. Also, it's emotionally draining for the patients actually rely on you for everything. And…" She pointed towards the nurses table. "Those girls work damn hard to make us doctors look damn good. The only bone I have to pick with you Dr. Pierce is you flirt with them way too much. Those women are not cushy little play toys for you to use to keep yourself warm. They are hard workingwomen who get less pay and less gratitude for their service. And, if you want to show how much you care about them you can treat them like you would treat a member of your own family."

The nurses table erupted in clapping. Nurse Kellye added from across the room.

"And gifts would be nice too."

Frankie scowled at the remark, "You don't have to buy them gifts." She whispered, "Give them an inch they will take a foot." She gazed at Pierce's puppy dog eyes. No one could resist the look. "You're a good guy, Pierce."

"Thank you." He wasn't sure what else to say. "So are you."

BJ added. "We doctors promise to treat the ladies here with a little more respect. And ask if the nurses need help with some of the physical labor."

"That would be great." Margaret told them. She than whispered to Frankie, "I've been telling Pierce that forever. I think he really needed to hear it from another doctor. I totally agree with you."

"Now that's settled," Colonel Potter interrupted. "Frankie, Sidney and I agree you need to stay on as a surgeon here if your gonna have any chance at getting the brass to accept women doctors. Though you will continue to be listed as a nurse the more documentation, I can submit for you in a doctors role the better the chances. You're in a very unique position, Frankie."

Winchester mouthed the word, "Frankie?"

The doctors shrugged at one another for Potter always used cognomens.

The Colonel continued, "Now I do need to give you all your options and then you can decide what you want to do. You can stay on as a nurse. You can stay on listed as a nurse working as a doctor in hopes of getting the brass to let woman doctors in the medical corps. Or you can go home. You were hoodwinked into this. You weren't drafted. You don't have stay here if you don't want too. I know this isn't what you signed up for."

"If I stay and act as a doctor what could the army do to you and the other doctors? Could you get in trouble?"

"We could face a court martial," Colonel Potter bluntly told her.

The tent fell silent. An historic moment had been reached. Frankie's decision could affect the future of the army in general. She could leave. Just get up and leave Korea and never look back at the mistake she made. Or she could stay. As a nurse she would be helping but not fully at her potential. If she took on the challenge there was no guarantee it would even work. Worse she and the other doctors could face a court martial later on.

She glanced around the table. Her eyes locked on each of their faces.

"Would you guys be willing to risk a court martial to get the army to let women doctors in?"

Silently they all looked at one another. Slowly one by one they began to nod in agreement. Like a secret pack had been made…All or nothing.

Major Houlihan spoke on their behalf, "The cause would be worth it. We need doctors in a war…Male or female. They can take my rank and throw me in the brig for allowing one my nurses to act as a doctor. But damn it, you already proved you can do this. If it weren't for you a lot of young men would have died and maybe even some of our own people from food poisoning. You came though for us. We're gonna be there for you."

Gulping she nodded, reflecting in her decision. She looked at Potter.

"I guess I'm in the for the long haul."

The old man grinned, "So am I."

Sidney added a suggestion. "It might be beneficial if Dr. Peterman wasn't in the nurse's tent. Not that there is anything bad about the tent or the nurses there. I'm thinking from a brass point of view, who would use anything against her, living with the nurses might be one of those things to use against this little movement you guys got going here."

Houlihan made an unprecedented move, "She can stay with me in my tent." Never before had she made such an offer. It signaled to the others just how deep her commitment to the cause was.

Sidney shook his head, "But you're still a nurse. They would see that as still being in with the nurses. They could even use that as reason to doubt Peterman should be listed as a doctor."

"Pup tent?" Frankie looked at Father Mulcahy and grinned in their private joke. "Start praying, Father."

He made a cross sign, "Lord have mercy."

Potter spoke up, "I agree with you, Sidney. They will use that against her. But I don't have another tent for her. Where do you suggest I put her?"

"I was thinking the Swamp," Sidney admitted.

Frankie's jaw dropped, "Huh?"

Pierce rejected the idea, "No way! She's a woman. We can't have a woman in the Swamp."

"It's the doctor's tent. She's a doctor." The psychologist explained.

BJ puckered his nose, "I don't think Dr. Peterman would be very comfortable there. I mean none of us are very comfortable there."

"The Swamp is disgusting! Can't I just stay with the nurses? Maybe put up a wall of pantyhose or something?"

Sidney disagreed. "If you want the army brass to take this seriously you need to be with the other doctors. Working as a doctor, eating with the doctors, sleeping with the doctors…"

"Sleeping?" Major Houlihan snorted.

"In the same tent," Sidney corrected. "Not literally. She needs to be one of the boys for this to work."

Charles remained unusually quiet. A slight smile crept across his face. He spoke gently but firmly.

"I totally agree with Dr. Freedman. I think Dr. Peterman's plight would be best suited right there with us in the Swamp."

She blinked, "Have you seen that place? It's gross!"

"I live in it!" Charles reminded her. "Eventually you get use to the…Smell."

She looked at Hawkeye hoping he would have the good sense to say no. Instead he shrugged.

"Well, if were gonna do this might as well go all the way."

Frankie gapped at the choice of words, "Oh god."

"Lord have mercy," The Father repeated.

The End.

(Continue in next story)


End file.
